Teela Hart

Surviving Domestic Violence

Onslaught *Heavy Triggers*

22 Comments


I cannot force anyone to understand domestic violence if they have never experienced it. However, I can most assuredly give a sneak peek into the life of a DV victim/survivor and hope that someone will open their mouths or quite simply click the share button. To remain silent is to be complicit in this crime.  I’m just sayin’.  One more thing.  I lived for  nineteen years in domestic violence, I escaped, and I had to watch and think on these things as I made this post.  Remember that.

 

Now take a deep breath and move on to the next one.

 

Take your time, clear you head and keep watching.

 

Enraging isn’t it?

 

As painful as it is to watch this tragedy multiply that by infinity and you’ll begin to understand how painful it is to live it.

If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, please visit http://www.nomore.org for a list of domestic violence centers specific to your location. You can also contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at http://www.thehotline.org or call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). If you feel you are in immediate danger contact your local law enforcement by calling in the U.S. 911

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Author: Teela Hart

I am a mother, daughter, sister and domestic violence survivor.

22 thoughts on “Onslaught *Heavy Triggers*

  1. Twitter and Facebook with this – I’ll have to watch in stages as the first one kicked me in the guts right from the get go.

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  2. My aunt survived two decades of verbal abuse from her husband. She has been living with us for five years now and I am happy to say that she has regained her dignity and recovered her self-worth. There’s no divorce in our country one can apply for legal separation (but you won’t be able to remarry) and annulment, in which case you can remarry after it’s been approved by the church and state. But this is costly and in most cases – gets dragged for years.

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  3. I’ve not experienced DV.

    fab post.

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  4. Awesomely done Teela, I hope all those that still have on blinders and believe it must be something she/he did to cause it sees this. I hope it causes them to rethink and act. I hope one day this type of post will no longer be necessary. Thank you!

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  5. I watched them all….No matter how much I read or research various personality disorders, I will never understand how a person can treat another this way. I have a ton of empathy, but I can’t grasp the feeling of an abuser-and I am glad of that…it is probably because they are mean, empty bodies with no human feelings…💜

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  6. Hi sweetie. Consider me the sin eater of DV. Perhaps even a glutton for punishment. I knew what I would see and still I watched the videos. I watched them to remind myself how bad it was. And when the guy came busting in the door when the girl was on the stairs, I saw Kevin’s face. Even when he was shrouded in shadow, I saw his face plain as day. And I heard that hissing in my ear. I saw his face on the man standing in the first video at the end pulling her head back by her hair. That woman was once me. I know how those blows feel. I remember the burning, the stinging, and the blood, trying to desperately cover all the busted lips, blacks eyes, welts, and cuts with makeup that just couldn’t be thick enough. I remember being punished because the marks showed through the mountain and cake of concealer and foundation and pressed powder. Nothing could hide it and still no one saw. How can they not see these things? How can they not hear the yelling? The thumping noises I had to have made being thrown to the floor and pummeled on?

    Thank you for reminding me I need a bigger shovel. Odd bit of gratitude, right? I needed a sucker punch today, and maybe this is why I watched it. Them, I watched them all. I am so busy reaching to help everyone else that I am forgetting that I am still here. That I still need care, but I won’t ever ask for it.

    That straight jacket is almost exactly what it is like. Except sometimes there are chains wrapped around, secured with locks, duct tape, rope, and a whole ton of other things. Some days it is like being buried in cement with only your eyes and nose above the set, and all you do is be pounded on like a jack hammer. Some days, it’s like your in that straight jacket and thrown in a pool. Others into quicksand. We struggle and fight and desperately thrash in urgency to survive, and to leave to takes every last ounce of strength we have.

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    • I’m sorry it brought you so much pain. It does the same for me, but I can’t get away from it. I feel as though I’m hell bent on exposing the truth and maybe I’m too forward with it I don’t know. It feels like a compulsion. I didn’t have recordings of the things I went through and I suppose I’m searching for things with a certain “shock and awe” value in order to give myself a voice as much as giving a voice to those who still have their mouths chained shut.

      Thank you for sharing this with us. I watched them for the purpose of the post and I’ll never watch them again. These things still plague me and I guess they will for a long time. It’s the stage of recovery I’m in I suppose.

      It is imperative to me to make posts that move people emotionally. Not just dry statistics and pretty pleases. I’m trying to strike a chord, not with survivors but with those not so familiar with domestic violence. I don’t know if I’m succeeding in that I just hope that I am.

      Love you
      Teela ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Makes me want to go Dexter Morgan on those assholes and get women some vigilante justice. That’s the heart behind the art and poem in this post – http://21shadesofblue.com/2014/04/06/wolfs-illusion-in-the-dark/ I blogged it early on in our friendship, so you may have missed it.

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  8. I still cannot watch the videos, but just know I know, and 19 years, my gosh. I am so happy you are out of it, and can finally focus on making the life you deserve and want. Hug, and keep up the good work! 🙂

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    • Thank you so much. I understand that you can’t watch, I’m hoping to reach those who have never experienced it to the degree that I have or at all.
      Thank you again 🙂

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  9. harrowing, Teela, and a must-see for everyone. Sharing NOW. xxx

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  10. Great info!

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