Teela Hart

Surviving Domestic Violence

You Didn’t Break Me (As Hard As You Tried)

16 Comments


WRITTEN BY: Carey Hart

I don’t understand
I’ve done my best not to drown
I cant stop all the things
that are swarming me now
the decisions I’ve made
haven’t helped me thus far
and it grates on my soul
with the vengence of hell
it brings hate to my heart
and drowns all my thoughts
when all I can do
is just fall apart
so I swallow my pride
and choke down the tears
and fight all the hatred
that dwells deep inside
I want to unleash the anger
I want to scream at the sky
I want to take all these words
and just make you cry
I want to flip the fuck out
I want to strangle your soul
I want to make you bow down
until I can feel whole
so don’t forget what you’ve done
and don’t you dare look at me
because the last thing I need
is to remember your face
I hope your happy now
with all the pain that you’ve dealt
it may have left all these scars
and damaged my soul
but you can bet your damn ass
that I will make it through this

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16 thoughts on “You Didn’t Break Me (As Hard As You Tried)

  1. If your son doesn’t already, he may like this song! I heard it on an episode of one of my favorite shows, Sons of Anarchy.

    “David”
    by Noah Gunderson

    I keep kicking at the curb with my worn out shoes
    and I keep running into stranger’s that say I know you
    and I don’t wanna be a proud man just wanna be a man.
    A little less like my father and more like my dad.
    I wanna hunt like David,
    I wanna kill me a giant man,
    I wanna slay my demons,
    But I got lots of them, I got lots of them.

    I try to keep my conscience clean.
    I try to keep myself out of your bad dreams.
    I try to wash my hands for you every night,
    oh, lest you find my strangling fingers
    wrapped around tight.
    I wanna hunt like David,
    I want to kill me a giant man,
    I wanna slay my demons,
    But I got lots of them, I got lots of them.

    I wanna hunt like David,
    I wanna to kill me a giant man,
    I wanna slay my demons,
    But I got lots of them, I got lots of them

    Liked by 1 person

  2. That was beautiful!

    “I want to strangle your soul
    I want to make you bow down
    until I can feel whole”

    I relate so much to that passage…

    I have come to believe that psychopaths do not have souls, or are not connected to their souls. It is a comfort for me to know that, as it explains to me how they can hurt anyone so much, without conscience. And at the same time, I feel like revenge is already fulfilled, as these people are born in a bad state, and cannot feel alive in the first place, since they do not have souls to connect them to humanity. They are not human, and need no pity. They are already dead.

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  3. I love you too Carey Hart and Mommy Teela. Thank you for sharing. May your spirits rise to strengthen others.

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  4. A powerful post, and I felt every word. A massive well done to Carey, who clearly is bursting with strength – and you you Teela, for raising this talented young man. It gives me hope.

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  5. Powerful. Keep on writing, Carey. Keep on healing. You are awesome.

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  6. Reblogged this on Teela Hart and commented:

    This post was made by my son Carey Hart. He is such a talented writer and I am proud of him for allowing his heart to be lay bare before us all.
    I love you Carey Hart.

    Like

  7. I’m slightly embarrassed guys because for some reason it must have said my mom wrote this when I posted it. Either way thank you all for your support.

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  8. Hi Teela…so powerful! So beautifully written. I can feel your soul and your power. This is part of the whole that is you…Every experience, every triumph. I wish you to always know your power. Blessitude ~ Lorrie

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  9. Such power displayed – the underlying power of your resolve which helped bring you thru to the end – of which is not really an end. An end to a book – there are many volumes ahead….

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  10. Your determination at the end had me cheering “you go warrior spirit! YES!”

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  11. Wonderful feeling of strength at the end of this. Well done, Teela, and good for you.

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  12. Your expression of pain and anger is compelling and it draws the reader in and spreads the anger at such injustice to another but the part I enjoyed the most was the blatant in your face sheer sense of determined survival that you would let no one take from you. Well done.

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